Remarks on "Friendship"

How does one defi­ne "fri­end­ship"? Is it like: "Two birds of a fea­ther stick togeh­ter"? I guess so. We choo­se fri­ends to be simi­lar to what we are, not ali­ke, just similar.

How do we know, someone is a true fri­end? We don´t - ever! What we see is how a per­son acts, and we might be con­vin­ced that this guy or gal is our fri­end - but we can never be sure .... unless fri­end­ship is pro­ven, unless we have gone through hard times and did pre­vail becau­se a fri­end jum­ped in to sup­port us.

Let me tell you a true sto­ry - about a true friend:
When I went to the United Sta­tes in 1963 I was all by mys­elf, no fami­ly, no fri­ends. When I left the USA after my exch­an­ge year I had won one true fri­end - for life!

One day, when I wal­ked to school, a guy stop­ped at the curb and asked me if I nee­ded a ride home. I accept­ed and jum­ped in. Wow, a 63´ con­ver­ti­ble, one of tho­se you see in James-Dean-movies (which is gre­at now, but at that time it was just what the cars were like, no big deal). I got my ride home, and next mor­ning the car pul­led up into my foster parent´s dri­ve­way, Jim - which was his name - picked me up for school. To make the long sto­ry short: This went on every day, until my last day in High-School, i.e. Gou­ver­neur Seni­or High, GHS.

From late August 1963 to June 1964 we got to be the best bud­dies in the world, went through a lot of good and bad times, got into trou­ble here and the­re, but our fri­end­ship grew from day to day. We both had a few "affairs", not­hing real­ly serious, not­hing that kept us from fishing, movies and par­ties. We even play­ed in the Seni­or "Dra­ma" tog­e­ther. Jim won the "Dea­no­ni­an", a speech con­test, I had to do a lot of spee­ches for clubs like the LIONS, ROTARY, 4H, "Future Home­ma­kers of Ame­ri­ca" etc., we sat in front of the TV tog­e­ther in late ´63, when Pre­si­dent Kenn­dy was asas­si­na­ted, when the news about Ame­ri­can sol­diers get­ting kil­led in Viet­nam star­ted to appear on TV.

We knew, it would be hard to part, to let go and both live on dif­fe­rent con­ti­nents after June ´64! We made plans how to keep cont­act, who was going to visit whom at which time - but fate would have it - it was all futile!

I had two more years to go to School in Ger­ma­ny, Jim joi­n­ed the Navy, we had lots of chan­ges of address - and final­ly my mail kept coming back "return to sen­der, reci­pi­ent unknown"! We had lost touch, ouch!

OK, let me tell you, how we got in touch again: It was due to the INTERNET! I lear­ned that one was able to search for peo­p­le at US-tele­pho­ne sites. I did. I found my good old bud­dy, who was - again - living in the Sta­te of New York, after he had been in West Vir­gi­nia and Washing­ton (Sta­te!). So much luck. We made plans to see each other, tal­ked on the pho­ne for hours, on the inter­net, too.

How do I know he is still my best fri­end? He would go out of his way to sup­port me, just like he did the first few months when I deci­ded to live in the USA for some time - may­be forever.

After we had not seen each other for more than 30 years, I was living in his hou­se, dro­ve one of his cars, got help in wha­te­ver situa­ti­on I nee­ded it, got advice how to do things and acti­ve help to set up an account at a local bank, to get a place to live in, to get a pho­ne, to get a driver´s licen­se - I could go on like this, it would be the lon­gest list ever.

How many of you would do a thing like this? How many of you would open your hou­se to a fri­end after 30 years "no see"? Think about it, and you will under­stand what "true" fri­end­ship is. Thanks again, Jim, God bless you!

That´s it for today, sor­ry, no "remarks" tomor­row, the next topic will be on on Sun­day and it will be "Bemer­kun­gen zu Hin­der­nis­sen / Rer­marks about Obs­ta­cles." In Eng­lish again, to acquaint you with chan­ging lan­guages .... see you!

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